so anyway, on the day of eid we had the prayer at home.. although its an annual event to go to the mosque for the eid prayers, this year abah was down with the flu.. so we decided not to go to the mosque since no one will b home to look after abah.. thus, we had the eid prayers and takbir in the living room.. it was a nice one nevertheless..
then we had the makan2.. and then pak ngah and his fanily came to visit.. Alhamdulillah there was a bit of sharing session.. it was an impromptu session but i felt it really 'basahkan' my soul yang dah kekeringan tazkirah/usrah.. they talked about tauhid and how we need to learn and kenal Allah.. how we need to realize that every aspect of our lives is controlled by Allah.. the hand or fingers that we move is not actually moved byus but by the power of Allah.. even as i'm typing and the thoughts that i have is not from me.. it's by the power of Allah and from Allah orders.. makes me feel so small that nothing in this world belongs to me but i owe everything in the world to Allah.. that all the wealth, intelligence, good looks etc is not ours or due to us but because Allah wills for us to have it.. therefore there's no need for riak/takbur/ujub since nothing belongs to us.. and how we should realise that all the ibadah e.g 5 wajib prayers that we do is not a favour for Allah but it is part of our responsibility to Him..
mashaAllah i know it may sound trivial and u may have known it all but having someone close to u remind u that your ibadah is not just acts of tunggang terbalik but there's a deeper meaning and understanding behind our ibadah..
i forget sometimes that i have to pray supaya Allah bukakan jalan/temukan dengan org utk tambahkn ilmu to understand islam and semoga ilmu yg kita dapat itu ilmu yang benar and tidak sesat inshaAllah
i pray i can meet someone who reminds me of islam and pulls me back to the straight path if ever i start to stray or become senget sket since i have many flaws.. i hope this doa is not too much since i know i'm not a really good person and don't deserve someone like that.. but i really hope at least i can meet someone i can discuss about islam with.. and not feel weird after that.. and beramal better after that.. ameen
a servant to Allah who most of the time forgets her place, and needs a bit of heart to heart every now and then to remind her of where she stands,
ps: please make me among hambaMu yang engkau redha Ameen