of being emotional

hi world.. its me again.. okay, so today's writing is only meant for me..

im cranky and moody.. it might be my pms..😭

they say happiness comes from within.. i'm not sure i wanna believe that.. 

partly it is true.. but i also find being grateful is a part of happiness which one can achieve by looking at their surroundings and what one has ahieved.. and then the other rebellious side of me now thinks that happy endings are justa fairy tale and only exists in heaven.. ah slowly i feel like i'm giving up on life 😭

don't worry i still have insight and i am not yet depressed but yes i am moody and broody

hmm yes i'm actually sad, sad that some things may not end up the way i want it to be.. i know they say, "well, that's life" and acceptance is a very tough lesson to learn.. currently i seem to be failing.. very bad.. sobs, i feel like crying..myb i will.. before i go to bed today.. 

my friend said to me, if its meant to be, its meant to be, if its not then its also God's will.. 

okay i'm feeling like crying now.. hopefully my next entry i'll pass my pms state and become euthymic again.. ahh this is so hard, please be strong heart

pray that i can be strong pleasee 

thank you

yours,

me

mode: currently missing home 😭😭😭