Yaumul Jumaat

besides being one of those blessed days, it also marks the end of my week.
which is such a relief.

the whole week i've been so gloomy. i honestly don't know why. i guess it's one of those things that goes unexplained. no matter how hard i try to make sense of it. i still couldn't find a cure.
and it made my week terribly horrible.

i guess it doesn't take much for us to forget about what's important in life. when we're busy with our own lives and seldom reminded of the disappointing reality that others might be facing.
Alhamdulillah.
we're still alive and breathing and able to appreciate the things that matters to us.
it's true what's mentioned in the Quran, that patience can help you prevail in the end. even in the darkest times when it's so easy to lose hope, it can guide you to through. it might not mean much. but until you've experienced it can you truly understand.

anyhow, that's that. the week's finally over. i guess it wasn't too bad. i did manage to meet new people, discovered a new place to dine, and a friend taught me a bit about playing drums (although it was only an imitation of guitar hero). still, it did somehow made my week better ;)

sometimes,
taking a step back can help you see what's really important.
making sure you're on the right track.
giving you strength for the journey ahead.

it's amazing how small your heart is
how it carries all your feelings inside
concealing them from judging eyes
so you could paint a smile

i hope it never bursts.

it's not that i do things without thinking,

it's that i don't think enough about doing it.
-nmj

Puhghotozowa

Bonjour~ hey therrrre people.

I'm feeling quite happy today. which might explain my sudden urghge to wghrite about my day. what's up with my poor spelling? actually i'm trying to make the words sound a bit french-y..why? well today i had a lecture on parasites (which should be read as- paghazite) and somehow I got influenced. and yeah, the lecturer was french. cool right? she managed to keep me awake throughout the one hour lecture (which doesn't happen so often i might add).
All thanks to her accent.

paghamezium..puhghotozowa..plasmodium falcipaghum eghithgrhocytes..

Saying the words with a french tongue makes them sound so much more interesting. and of course, she's an excellent lecturer. very funny one too.

She certainly adds to my list of foreign lecturers. There's a Russian lecturer teaching Physiology, a Danish lecturer teaching ethics, an Indian lecturer teaching Immunology, and an Italian teaching Anatomy. I adore each and every one of them. Their ability to articulate themselves perfectly despite their accent just strikes me. Somehow it gives me my inspiration to keep on going in this alienating place.

Sometimes I feel that nobody really understands what I'm trying to say here, might as well just keep quiet. Well, that was before, now I know that I'm never going to do myself any good if I just keep it all to myself. I'm not going to lie and say it's easy to survive in a foreign land, but it also couldn't be an excuse for me not to excel in my studies. I guess the challenges that you face is what makes you different from the rest. How you're able to get through them are the true lessons in life. and in the end, when you're finally crossing the finish line (insyaAllah), there's no substitution for what you've accomplished. and when you're able to succeed in the toughest condition..hoyeah, that certainly demands respect (or maybe just self satisfaction would do). *wink

you won't really appreciate the sweetness of honey until you get stung by the bees guarding them.

i made up a terrible analogy but i guess it does convey the meaning somehow (probably not to the extent of getting stung).

By the way, my sis usrah just got admitted into hospital because of infection. Let's all pray for her well being (Amin..) and hopefully she'll get better in no time insyaAllah. She's really such a nice person and it's sad to see her lying debilitated on the bed. hope she'll get through this life's test soon.

oh why the laziness?

memories..
these are what remains forever.
no matter where you are..
and no matter how far..

you'll always have a place inside of me..
though the paths we've chosen might not be the same..
time and experience might have brought you to change..
it's okay.

cause deep down inside..
i know you're still you..
you're still kind and thoughtful..
and compassionate and wonderful..
it's what makes you special,
what makes you, you
what makes me miss
seeing you each day

laughters we've created
road trips we've ventured
fights we've bared
tears we've shed
secrets we've kept
crushes we've shared

learning, understanding, searching, finding
exploring, wondering, failing, winning
through all the times
through all the years
you were there with me
teaching me to stay strong
without even realizing

and for that i'm thankful
to have been so blessed
with such great friends

though you're far away
it doesn't matter
cause i'll always remember you
thanks to the times
we've been through
together

thanks for the memories

heheh, rite, so this entry is just an excuse for me not to start doing my Biochem assignment which is due tomorrow (yeah, quite sucks to have homework in the weekends).
i guess i didn't intended for it to be this jiwang and cheesy, but then, reading it again i really did mean what i wrote. heheh, i guess there's always a bit of jiwangness in all of us. (it depends on us whether we choose to reject it or embrace it haha).
anyway, this goes out to my besties in BBB (z,q,atty,yannie,zati,nada), al-aminians, ikhlasians, budimanians, Al-Khwarizmians, M06jians, (haha the names sound a bit funny adding -ians at the end of my classes) and all my friends no matter where you are.
and to my Bristol friends as well, which I'm hoping to share many more stories and experiences to come insyaAllah.
you guys really taught me about life a lot. and it's a blessing (thank you Allah) to have met and be friends with u ols. haha. seriously! :)

alright, i guess since i'm done with this i'll have to get back to my work. (currently listening to leona lewis run, i love it)
till then.

balik kampung oh oh oh~

So it's nearing the end of February already. It seems so fast how time flies. Well maybe not always. Time goes by quite slow when you're actually in the moment and hoping for something to end soon. But surely, when it's finished you'll find yourself so surprised how quickly it ended. when it's like only yesterday you started it. Well my friends, that usually happens when you're occupied and you have so much to do in a day that you won't have the time to be wasting it on unnecessary things (such as..facebooking haha). I remember when I had the same feeling at the end of first sem. I was busy preparing for my Anat-Histo-Biochem exams that I didn't actually realize my first 3 months in Bristol Uni was coming to an end. It felt like only last week or so that I started my course and right now, it's the end of sem. Frankly speaking, I'm glad that it's getting by so quickly. I guess the first few month wasn't a very pleasant one for me. Trying to fit in such a different crowd, adjusting to the different weather (which wasn't so bad by the way hehe), trying to figure out what the lecturers were saying (yeah man, some of them talk real fast, and what about the accent? that's a tough one), trying to find your way around and memorizing the streets, and well, the other difficulties that you have to experience when coming to a different country. Not to mention the insecurities, inferiority complexes, daunting feelings, frighteness and all sorts of feelings that would arise when you're unsure of what might lie ahead of you. When you're all alone and out of your comfort zone.

So right now I really can't wait to finish my 2nd term and be back in Malaysia for the summer hols. I'm really looking forward to have a wonderful time with my family back home.. to go to pasar malam, eat yong tau foo, balik kampung, eat seafood by the beach at nite.. and just going on a road trip somewhere with the whole family on board. That would be really great. Just last week I ordered some of my photos to be printed from the internet. It arrived after 3 days and I was really excited to stick them on to my board. There's pictures of my family and I when we were in Sabah for a holiday. It was really amazing. and the pictures turned out really great, with the sun shining gayly, the seas swaying, the fishes dancing and all of the wonderful sceneries on the island. Really made my heart jump a few beats thinking about the wonders of Allah's creation. and such a blessing it is to be coming from a country of so many cultures and natural wonders.. so i guess from all this babbling what i'm really trying to say here is that..(well, you might have guessed it already but i'm still going to say it out loud)..
I'm missing my family right now. and i can't wait to be getting home~ :D

Seriously?

Freedom of speech.

Are you sure that's really what it is?
If you ask me, that's just a platform for people to thrash others without worrying about creating a stir and insecurities in the community.
It's true you could learn a lot from hearing what others have to say.
But seriously, does it have to come with such a huge cost?
People beating over each for some stupid cause that they themselves are too immature to actually take some time to learn about?

There's a reason why people put limits to certain things. and this is definitely one of them. Yeah, rules and limits can be really annoying at times. but think about it again, would it be better if there weren't any rules? would people have better conduct without any rules? would crimes get lesser if laws were not created in the first place? would this world be a better place if people were able to do whatever they please? that would be nice wouldn't it? not worrying about the consequences of your actions? of course, that would only be possible if everyone living on earth had a heart of gold. putting others before themselves, being considerate, compassionate, kind, polite, patient...and well, the list just goes on and on..but just stop. we're not made of gold. finding someone with a heart of gold would be so rare and actually quite impossible (literally..hehe). so i guess the thought of not having any limits to whatever we do in life is quite unrealistic really.

what's so hard about accepting people who are different? is it such a threat to you that people dress differently or don't follow the trends of the century? does it worry you that people don't drink as much as you? does it harm you that people have different reasons to live than you?

that's the beauty of diversity. just take a step back. try to see it from a different light. this world is such a wonderful creation to be viewing it from only one end of the spectrum.