anyway, i just came back from Spring Camp 09. It was carried out at a Scouts Camp in Staffordshire. we stayed for 3days 2 nights. learning about a lot of things. realizing our purpose in life. understanding Islam. experiencing it's teachings. forming new relationships. strengthening the one's that's already built. but mainly, understanding what is required from us. It was really an eye opener. hope i'd be able to sustain what was gained. learning is one thing, understanding is another, and practicing is also a different thing and yet the hardest. hardest. but not impossible perhaps? hehe i don't know. again, i'm sorry if what i'm saying doesn't really give a good explanation.
i kept remembering my mom throughout the camp. maybe i'm a sissy. i don't know. but how i wish she was there to comfort me. i guess i miss her giving me advice. i miss sharing what i gain with her. i miss hugging her. i miss her telling me that everythings going to be alright insyaAllah. i miss going to the kitchen with her to make tea at night. i miss telling her stories about my life.
i miss her telling me that she loves my paintings. i miss her strength. i miss her courage. i miss her love and care. i miss her always being there if i needed a shoulder to cry on. never judging me, just giving me my time. i miss her telling me how her day went on. i miss her telling me about her students. i miss her saying "mama suke tgk angah makan" and just sit there beside me watching me feed myself with her cooking. hehe. i miss her rubbing me when watching tv. i miss her saying "angah da besar" in a sense that i'm no longer a little girl. i miss her stability. i miss her effect of calming me down, eventhough she might not see that. i miss her reminding me of my goals in life. and always to depend on Allah.
i guess it doesn't help seeing someone like your mom teaching you at the camp. ai. so not the time to be all sedey2 han.
hmm, maybe whoever said that absence makes the heart grow fonder went to Spring Camp too. a very very very very very long time ago. hehe ;p
May Allah bless mama and abah! amiin ;D
tingat gler kt mak masing2 sebab dorang la byk ajar kite hal2 cmtu slame ni. tp wen da jauh, kite kurang dpt nasihat cmtu. xde sape nk cek bcaan quran kite da kt sni, dlu mak cek. dlu mak yg teman makan, tgok tv, wlpun tpksa tgok rncangan yg mak suke~ akademi alquran, tp kite xkesah, sebab mak. even mak gak dlu yg ingatkn pasal ibadat. tp skrg makin leka.
ReplyDeleteand what i miss the most is listening to her quran recital everytime i wake up in the morning.. so soothing..
wlp dorang bz jga family, masak, kemas sume, tp dorang kuat g jga ibadat. kite? stakat duk sorang pun, xde tggjwb selain blaja, pun da malas2an. myb we need to remind each other bout it, nad.
youuu~
ReplyDeletei dh cry reading ur entry ni. dhla i kt work. huhu.
yep, insyaAllah. kite kene ingtkan masing2. skrg kite pokus study dulu. exam da dekat. kecuakan. hehe. berusehe!! yarh!
ReplyDeleteals, jgn la nangis. nnt i rase bersalah nak tulis psl the pemeli. hehe, tula i, dlu mama bebel2 i mcm x dgr je. skrg da kerinduan da. ai. hehe. but don't tell mams ok.